Luann

Missing . . .

May 25th, 2014 by luann

It’s odd how missing something/someone can hit me out of the blue.  I was just sitting at the computer playing a mindless game and suddenly got such a feeling of melancholy.  I am missing my work friends.  It’s been three years since I retired.  I love my retired life, love the area I moved to, love being near my son, daughter-in-law and grandchildren.  I enjoy making my own schedule – sleeping in when I want, staying up until 2 a.m., making a habit of exercising three hours or so each day, getting my chores done at my leisure, spending lots of time with my husband – all very enjoyable.

I don’t miss work itself so much, as I manage to keep myself pretty busy.  I do miss feeling useful.  That’s a quirk of mine – I like to feel useful.  I like to feel like I accomplish something that means something to and/or is helpful to someone else.  Whether it was helping re-write policies or simply ensuring personnel got their rightful pay and benefits, I always felt I was serving a purpose – maybe bringing others some security and happiness.  Now, I still accomplish things – my home is clean, cupboards stocked, my yard looks nice.  My husband appreciates the little things I do, but somehow I’m not feeling so useful.  Once in awhile, I’ll get the opportunity to proof read something as a favor to a friend or type something up . . . then I feel useful for a time and that is a good feeling to me.

I find what, actually who, I miss most are my work friends.  The people who I saw frequently – those who came by my office with a smile, a hug, a simple “Good morning!”  I miss them so much.  I’ve come to realize that my work was the majority of my social life.  I’ve always been a bit of a wallflower – tend to be quiet when among a crowd – I’m not comfortable socializing in general.  The people at my work though – they became family over the years.  I saw their children born, saw many of those children grow up and marry.  I watched them go through personal struggles and losses; as they watched me.  We gave each other comfort, strength, laughter, joy . . .

I gained a lot when I retired and moved away, but I lost a “family” who meant so much in my life.  I’m missing them . . .

Posted in Blogging, Family & Friends, Ponderings

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